The Infection that Never Really Goes Away

The infection that never really goes away.

Gross title, right? What are you reading right now? What kind of infection? Who is this person posting on her website about an infection? Ew.

But it’s not that kind of infection.

I’m talking about One Direction infection. And even though I post this in a moment of weakness, I’ll refrain from feeling embarrassed about writing about a boy band and I won’t delete this post later for I know that the world NEEDS to hear this. (I posted this in May 2015 and then I deleted it LOL it’s back now)

This is my experience loving the former band One Direction.

It started in 2011, and I, a fourteen year old girl was lying in bed with my first generation iPod, watching Taylor Swift music videos on the Vevo app. An ad came up of 15 seconds of another music video. Five beautiful boys stared into my eyes while they were on the beach, kicking water at the camera and singing on the sand. Their hair flipped around and they sang of a positive message, “Kameron, you’re beautiful.” Well thanks Harry.

Who in the world are these people? I wasn’t that interested yet, but I wished to do some research so I clicked on the video, cautiously deciding to view it. These people looked close to my age and it wasn’t inappropriate-thank goodness or I would’ve felt terrible. I watched the “Gotta Be You” music video and then “What Makes You Beautiful” and then “Gotta Be You” again. “One Thing” was next and I was starting to like these boys.

Next came the learning about them. I quickly came to know their story, looking their auditions up on youtube and following the video diaries and tweets. Doncaster, Wolverhampton, Mullinger, Holmes Chapel, and Bradford became more than just cities just like how carrots became more than just a vegetable. The tour diaries were my favorite and I was impatient for new ones that showed more of their hilarious personalities. This is Us became my favorite movie. And I’m pretty sure ‘us’ included me.

I became obsessed to be honest, and once my other friends came to know who Harry Styles, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik, and Niall Horan were, I proudly stood taller knowing that I had known first. I was never really verbal about my love and obsession, but it was there and it was true.

Time went on and my love grew. I bought one of their books. I bought the tour DVD and watched it many times.

Then we moved to Tennessee and adjusting to new places takes time and I didn’t keep up with the pop gods as much. My obsession lessened. The infection was healing! I sold the book and DVD, I stopped googling their names.

It even went so far that when I got One Direction tickets for Christmas, we sold them and exchanged them for Taylor Swift tickets in Atlanta.  How had my infection healed so much? I get asked this a lot and I don’t have an answer. I just don’t know.  But looking back in retrospect I can’t believe we traded ONE DIRECTION tickets. And we have kept it a secret-we knew the hate we’d get. Well it’s out in the open now, please don’t rally at my house and protest my choice.

But wait! After much thought I have realized a pivotal moment in my infection healing. It was a summer day and I was on pinterest. My very impressive One Direction board was bothering me.  I’ve aged a few years, I’m more mature, why do I still hold onto 500+ photos of teenage boys I’ll never meet? And I made a very important decision.  With one click, I hit ‘delete board’.  And with another click I confirmed my choice. The deed was done. I was no longer an obsessed fan of the band everyone loved.

Fast forward two years. To now(2015). And here I am listening to the boys serenade me with “Torn.” And I’m sitting here writing about them because I sat in chemistry class earlier today and put my headphones in.  What should I listen to?

The answer was inevitable. Since I’ve lately been dreaming of randomly meeting the boys in London. I turned on “Up All Night” and continued with my work, looking around a bit and laughing at myself, because well, my peers are listening to rap and I am listening to the beginnings of the band One Direction.

Kameron, why are you writing all this? Don’t you have a 10 page paper on Abraham Lincoln due next week?

Well I guess I’m writing this because I’m a bit worried and confused. I had a well check today and the doctor asked if I had any questions. The only questions I have are, am I infected again? Am I okay with it if I am? Who are the members of One Direction to unknowingly take so many hearts and infect so many young girls?

And I wrote this to tell my story. Maybe this can help someone. Who knows if the One Direction infection ever really goes away? We might all be doomed to infection til we die.

Maybe someday I’ll laugh about this, but for now I’ll listen to their “Forever Young” version and cry as I look for old J-14 magazines that surely holds a poster of them. Mostly I’ll be looking for Harry because I am almost in love with him, again. It’s frustrating. Until next time,

Kameron [styles?]

UPDATE: Now it’s 2017. I wrote this in 2015 when I relapsed. 2016 was a year where I was not obsessed. I was sort of sad about them breaking up but I know in my heart they’ll get back together sometime so I don’t feel very bad about it. I still love listening to their music but I am not obsessed with One Direction. BUT.

I love Harry Styles. Don’t tell him but I have a crush on him again. It’s whatever. Like I daydream about meeting him and marrying him in an LDS temple. Idle thinking? Probably. But I wanted to share this with you.

Contact me and tell me your struggles with boy band obsessions! I’m thinking about starting a support group.

Kameron

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